Just an Update

ive been busy recently with err... school stuffs, the UP Fair (not that i need to) and that secret project i am working on with ry and some of ACs mods.. anyway, if all else will go well (and hope it will) ill be marketing something..

one more thing.. i went to the fair twice.. saw rivermaya (rico with his pink mickey mouse shirt) and parokya ni edgar! they really really rock! but i must say, rivermaya had more effect on me! grabeh!! rico was so sexy and he could carry i mean really carry that darn pink shirt! siguro the reason why i did not really enjoy parokya was because of the silly jologs people in front of us who did nothing but slam dance and create more chaos than i could create in a lifetime.. ill post pics if i find them.. hehe.. sana lang may nakuha kami kay rico.. ry took a video of parokya kasi.. hehe.. astig!

Smile

this is the sweetest smile i have ever seen.. it could only come from the most gorgeous guy in the planet, my baby.. :) despite the eyebags, he still remains the cutest ne?? and he never fails to make my day whenever he flashes that smile.. i am just soo lucky...

Peace Maker

the first ever gift i have received online.. aint it a cutie? thanks to pai-chan for learning to do this in the Photoshop for me.. im soooo excited for your new layout.. hehe.. take care! thanks soo much! and oh, great pixel art! way to go.. sorry if i was soo harsh before.. tc!

Reasons

mejo malungkot ngayon. something happened that i am too ashamed to talk about here. di ko pa kasi tanggap this time so maybe someday when i'd have the courage to talk about it, i will..

pero right now, that certain event made my self-esteem plummet soo low that i don't know if i still would be able to get it back to it's original level. it isn't exactly proper for me to fuss about it pero i think the main cause that we did not succeed was because i took it all to myself and kinda forgot that it was supposed to be a team effort and that the ultimate goal was to have fun and not to win..

sometimes i dont get God.. you pray hard and he refuses to liste. sometimes also, he surprises you with things you thought you did not need.. and sometimes, he frightens you with events you'd think you wont find your way out of but then He's there guiding you.. i have to admit, i really dont understand why i still have to go through al this pain, all this suffering and even all those happiness and pleasure.. i really dont but i do know he has a reason.. in due time i'd understand and when i do, he would give me a new set of things to explore and try to comprehend..

right now, the only choice i have is to wait.. He is after all the greatest in this world and i know that despite that, He is merciful and He loves me..

Copyright

ok im back.. bati na kami ni ry eh kaya may reason na naman ako para mag-blog.. hehe.. para kay ry tong blog na toh actually.. hehe.. love na love ko talaga yun..

anyway, uhmm hang lungkot kasi as you can see i changed my layout na naman.. :( kasi.. err.. napapagod nako kaka-explain pero someone "kinda" copied the way i designed my site.. i say kinda kasi she made modifications eh.. pero as i went through her blog, i couldn't help seeing myself and my work in it and it had me feeling so agitated and sooo disappointed.. no wonder people "who paid for their sites" fuss over direct-linking and protecting the contents of their sites.. ewan ko lang.. i made all my layouts from scratch.. natuto akong gumamit ng Photoshop, html and javascript for that na dati di ko ma-figure-out.. and when i get images or goodies from other sites, such as those that came from my "loved and adored" sites, i see to it that i follow the rules they have implemented.. and gladly di pako nakalagay sa "hall of shames" nila..

so ayun.. ang kinasama ng loob ko ay ginaya nya na nga, pati resources at terminologies (take note terminologies) ni hindi man lang nagpasalamat sakin.. or pinaalam sakin na gagawin nya pala yun! the nerve diba??

pero tapos na yun.. nag-apologize na sya at for the record, she deleted her blog.. frankly, she didnt have to do that. it was a good layout.. she sould've just credited me and it would be ok.. pero ok na rin.. bahala sya..

so ngayon, i made a copyright thingy sakin and placed a "no-right-click" code in my blog to protect it.. and pls lang sa iba jan na nagbabalak gumawa ng blog/website: be creative! try to explore your imagination and you'll see, it'll be fun.. and wouldn't it be great to have finished something really your own??

kung may law na sana for copyrights.. hahay.. ewan ko na lang..

Off

due to some EMOTIONAL DIFFICULTIES, i will not be blogging for a certain period of time as i will not be going online so i wont be able to update this.. to those who are willing, oh well keep in touch! take care y'all!

lolz!

i have an exam tomorrow but im blogging anyway.. hehe..

uhmm i'd be writing a diary entry today.. so this is what happened.. i got hooked on soy sauce because dimple got me into it! lolz! as in sinasabaw ko na sa kanin ang chilli soy sauce and i found it sooo addictive.. lolz again..

went to mass din again with dimple and twas a great mass.. bottom line is: let us all be salt and light to the world.. im looking forward to next week's valentines mass.. hehe.. lolz!

no i badly need to study!! lolz!

this day is full of laughter and of beauty... and as always, i have God to thank for it.. :)

Crossroads

inaway ko na naman si ryan.. pucha! sa lahat ba naman ng tao na pwede kong awayin yun pang tanging nagmamahal sakin ng buong-buo at tanggap ang lahat ng tungkol sa pagkatao ko. kung hindi ako nagkakamali, isang simple bagay lang naman ang pinagmulan ng pang-aaway ko sa kanya e: ang hindi nya pagsunod sa mga gusto kong mangyari.

ako kasi yung tipong taong todo panic pag nasa pressure situations. gusto ko kaagad na nagagawa at sa paraang gusto ko gawin, ang mga bagay na nais kong mangyari. at gumagawa pa ako ng kunwaring legitimate excuse pag nagkakaganon ako.. either may exam ako, nag-aaral or pagod.. basta ang consistent result non: nagagalit ako kay ry, pinipiga ko ang patience at ang sukdulan ng buong pagkatao nya..

pero iba siya.. instead na mag-crack-up at magretaliate, ry remains the calmest, most patient person when dealing with me. sya yung tipong batuhin mo man ng sandaang bato, ay bibigyan ka pa rin ng tinapay.. the more you get angry to him, the more gentle he becomes with you.. ang lalim na tao kasi nun eh. ako, lahat na yata ng bad sides ng pagiging isang human being nasa akin na. ang common defense ko pa nga pag nagiging bad na ako ay ang cliche na: "im only human.." subalit si ry hindi ganyan.. he always reminds me na wag magsettle at magpatalo sa sarili kong kahinaan. he said that the more na kino-consume ka non, the more daw dapat na dapat kang lumaban and he always tells me na walang ma-a-accomplish na bagay kung sa maling paraan mo ginawa and/or kung may nasasaktan kang tao. sya ang nagpakita sakin kung gano talaga kalalim ang depth ng human heart and that despite everything, love will always and never fail to understand the complexities of life's challenges...

madalas pag nag-aaway kami, kahit ako mismo di ko na maintindihan ang line of reasoning ko against him. pero ry always has the right words to either comfort me or shut me out or plainly debunk me.. he's both tough and gentle. tamang-tama lang timpla.. kaya siguro addicted ako sa kanya.. kaya siguro kahit madalas akong mainis at magalit sa kanya, di ko pa rin maikakaila na hindi ako mabubuhay ng wala sya sa tabi ko..

oo.. siguro ito na yung form of sincere apology ko sa kanya... ewan ko ba kung bakit dito ko pa ginawa.. ang pride ko nga naman.. pero nagsisisi naman talaga ako ng buong puso sa nangyari kanina eh.. hindi ko maipapangako na hindi na yun mauulit pero this time for real, i really really have to grow up...

tama sya eh.. bata pa daw talaga ako (well at least sa pag-iisip), no matter how many times kong i-claim na matanda na ako.. na kaya ko na.. pero hindi.. baduy man pero sabi nga ni britney, eto yung period na in between ako.. not a girl nga daw pero di pa ganap na woman..

at sa totoo lang, im super duper grateful na while im stuck in the middle.. one guy never gets tired of protecting me, of guiding me and of always reminding me that i am and will always be loved.. and that sa paglalakbay na yun hindi ako nag-iisa at never na rin akong mag-iisa.. i love you so much ry...